L8D<--no that's not an emoticon.
This is pretty much what I'd be talking about in this post:
So we had Bio from 9-10.30 on Friday, before rushing to Raiders for a quick session of DotA(quickie).
While we were waiting for the slow cashier/person-who-collects-EZ-link-cards to collect our (as his namesake) EZ-link cards, we noticed the difference in graphics and unfamiliarity of the scenes of a zombie-busting game.
It must be it. But instead of drum-rolls, it created many ripples of sexcitement akin to minor orgasms. OK, it was minor orgasms. I was more than willing to cut the crap out of DotA because I'd much rather play L4D2, but heck I'm a social animal so I played with them.
Then all too soon we had to leave for a second round of Bio(quite loserish right?) and I was more or less zoned out because I wanted to try out the melee weapons and new characters and have more minor orgasms because such sensual and happy moments are getting rare in present society.
So during Bio I was fighting a tough battle. I watched a movie alone once, and I was thinking of doing the same--except that it'd be a LAN session with those overwhelming zombies. Alone.
And that I did. The itch was too overwhelming, I just had to try it out. It was a hassle getting here and there because I got lost quite a few times and it was damn retarded when the AI(I was the only human survivor, the other 3 were AIs and coincidentally all males) wouldn't help me throw the kerosene to the first floor so that I could refuel the car quickly and escape from that shitty shopping centre. I tried and failed many times. AI is retarded.
Compiled below is a list of things I've learnt from L4D2:
1) Women are able to wield axes and katanas and chainsaws as effectively and deadly as men are despite obvious physical disadvantages and lack of training in such weapons.
2) Chargers are quite overrated. You can kill them before they get to you. Alone. Provided you have ammo and are looking at the right direction.
3) You can kill zombies with frying pans and guitars. I haven't actually used them yet but they say it's possible so it is.
4) AI characters are retarded. I had to run out of a place with Cola to fuel up some stuff and I thought I could rely on the AI to do it for me but no, they couldn't even provide enough cover for me to run safely.
5) Chainsaws run out of batteries.
No joke, I was stoning there and using the chainsaw like free when I saw a bar on the chainsaw icon decreasing in length and I was wondering 'Wtf?' when it burnt out and I dropped the chainsaw. It was a 'Huh?' moment but then they gave the notification that 'Run out of batteries' or something.
Can't wait to try out 'Realism' mode with friends. That'd mean you won't respawn, you can only be revived with a defibrillator kit. You really see it around, it's a bit freaky, you can find stuff like that in the lift. Also, the blue outline of a friendly character would be removed, SO IF YOU GET LOST YOU'RE DEAD.
I got lost often.
OMG I WANT TO PLAY ARGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH.
AND I WANT MY ZOEY BACK I DON'T WANT ROCHELLE.
Here's a poll, would you prefer:
Or this? Look at the woman, duh:
Ctrl+wheel to zoom in for a more pixellated version of her face. Not complaining.
Here's a completely random picture, I think it might be a real human acting as her but still:
I want to sink my teeth into her soft flesh and remove that M16. And that characteristic red jacket. And that characteristic pair of jeans, which isn't that characteristic when you put into consideration how plain jeans are. And whatever lies beneath both apparels. ((((((((((((:
The itch is coming back again.
-- 11/21/2009 12:53:00 AM
AdultFriendFinder
So my friend was talking to me about his friend who got laid through Adultfriendfinder or something, and he told me to join him because it's damn fun. This is an extract from that conversation with him, starting with my refusal to join him in his sexcapades:李毅韦: Pokemon breeds fast. says:
don't want, later my cherry tio pop how =\
fai. Wohohohoho Smallville. says:
cherry tio popped ur ass
guys lose their virginity when they masturbate?
not like there's anything else left to unlock
李毅韦: Pokemon breeds fast. says:
lololol
sounds like game like that
unlock
So as things are, I'm very tempted to join and be a man to my manhood.
No..not really.
-- 11/17/2009 02:19:00 AM
Bluff one lah.
Been a rather eventful week, what with OP and skipping of school on Thursday because I thought it was OP day for others and thus no lessons.Ooops. Life.
And then there's the BBQs. First it was bowling BBQ at Grace's condo. Don't really know her well, but yea, it's a BBQ and I'm just attending because I'm not a sociopath.
I went swimming halfway through in my PE attire and it was damn cold seeing as it rained beforehand and I was cursing myself and stupidity and my tendency to do stupid things but thank the fire.
So..yea.
That was Friday.
Then on Saturday, we had class BBQ which wasn't that classy considering the fact that it wasn't the whole class but more or less so oh well. It was quite fun but I fell asleep on the function room table. I tend to sleep around a lot =\
So yea, and Chef Tan's cooking was good, so we gave him a birthday cake because he deserved it. OK it wasn't for him alone but oh well.
OK so random.
Sometimes I wonder if that relationship is true. I thought it weird that you liked one person for so long, but that's fine, I mean, yea. But then suddenly you're in love with another? It's weird, I really don't understand how you work. And why are you still so like that even though you already have one?
Is it because the relationship isn't real? Is it because you're just treating that person like a last resort out of your drought of love? I don't get how that match was clapped up so suddenly, and I can't see how the relationship would last, and I somehow don't see happiness in your eyes, not that I'm trying to observe them in the first place but the lack of happiness is staring right into me. I don't understand a lot, and I really think that you're just grabbing for the sake of grabbing, because that's your last resort.
Why not start by being honest with yourself? Don't waste your time and emotional efforts along with your victim.
Or maybe I'm just thinking too much. Bah.
The inactivity of holidays just gives me a lot of time to cool off, to think things through, and more often than not I don't come out of it as a better man or anything along those lines, I just...never mind.
To another you. You claimed to know the loneliness of the night, to enjoy it, to be consumed by it. But I've never seen you online when I am, and I'm sometimes online till 5. The birds start crowing and chirping and making noise at around 4.30am, and I'd always be left thinking: Are you experiencing this at your side of Singapore? Or are you just lying?
I like being online late. It gives you a chance to know other people better. Like, if I were online late and there's a friend of mine whom I don't really talk to who is also online late, and his/her personal message/nickname sounds a bit off, you have a topic to talk about and at night, all inhibitions are lowered. Seriously. You feel more at ease to talk about stuff because you're probably tired to think about the repercussions, so like I said, you get to know other people better.
That's probably the reason why I'm always online late, because I'm seeking a chance. But for tonight it's because I want to use my energy pack but I want to level up first.
So anyway, I always feel slighted, as if I was holding onto a promise that was not fulfilled. There was no promise from you to be online late anyway, but I've always thought that you would be. I'm normally mistaken of course, and I get used to it. But when the birds chirp for the morning I always get a bit disappointed as I prepare to go to bed--Where are you? Not that I need to talk to you, but that I need to feel the presence of someone else like me.
My posts are getting really substandard and I should do something to brush them up but I really have nothing better to blog about because my thoughts are getting really private(parts).
Travian's ending soon, and I'm quite glad this intrusion into my life is ending soon. I get my life back, I don't have to wake up at weird hours to send attacks, etc.
My life is coming back.
-- 11/16/2009 12:42:00 AM
Back of your mind.
There are times when you get very affected by inconsequential things, and it's embarrassing to tell people why you're affected in the first place because the 'inconsequential' thing happens to be really inconsequential in nature, like1) Finding out that there's no more toilet paper only after you're done in a public toilet.
2) Realizing that your friend has made you an April Fool joke.
You're not supposed to take either case seriously, because the nature of jokes isn't to be taken seriously, and although you're quite disturbed by the fact that you've been made a fool, you're not supposed to show it because they didn't mean for it to be that way and you don't want to be a spoilsport.
Or perhaps you don't show it because you're supposed to be a matured individual capable of brushing failed sexperiences aside and not bothering with them and moving on as time passes.
But there are times when these failed sexperiences comes back to haunt you in a variety of ways, and you realize that you're powerless to stop being highly-affected even though you're supposed to have moved on in life. You do not understand why you're behaving or feeling this way, and even if you do, you don't know what to do with your emotions and behaviour.
Then, because it's an embarrassing thing, you act like it's not affecting you although it would affect anyone else of a similar predicament, because you're supposed to be 'matured' and an open admission of being affected isn't too healthy for your matured image.
So you resort to going about life as usual, talking on MSN, playing Mafia Wars and Travian, and being as active as you are previously, but you know that there's no one out of the 95 people online on your MSN that you can share this secret with, because it's embarrassing and because secrets are not meant to be shared.
Then you try to move on and get over this sudden hounding of the past failed sexperience by doing other stuff because what you're doing, the normal stuff, doesn't work--acting normal doesn't make you normal.
But you really don't know what to do, so you make some noise about it and throw it to the back of your mind and hope it doesn't hound you. As long as you don't observe and don't visit, well, out of sight out of mind, but
it's still at the back of your mind.
-- 11/10/2009 11:27:00 PM
Hi.<--loser.
Hi.That's a very common way of starting conversations. But what's the significance of that simple greeting?
More importantly, is it really needed?
Looking back all my conversation histories, I've decided for myself that to the people I'm rather close to/am comfortable with talking to, I don't use 'Hi'. I jump straight to the topic.
Scenario 1: Facebook. If I read some emo-status, I don't write on that person's wall nor comment on the post. I go straight to that person on MSN and go
Why so emo?
There's no need to mince over words. I don't like to waste my time trying to be extra-tactful with my friends, because I'm normally quite tactful(self-proclaimed), so I think I'm quite blunt(self-proclaimed). I mean, why bother to go like
A: Hi
B: Hi
A: Um..wasuup?
B: Uhh what talking you?
A: Norh..your Facebook status
B: Huh? Which one?
A: Norh, that one lor. *copy pastes*
A: Aye, why so emo? =\
B: Aye, nothing much lah. =\
A+B: *A probes and B relents*
as opposed to
A: Eh why so emo?
B: Aye, nothing much lah. =\
A+B: *A probes and B relents*
Being direct saves pixels(and memory space because I keep my chat log). So why not? This is another way of saying 'Aiya everyone brother we don't beat about the bush get straight to the point tell me what happened.'
Otherwise known as: 开门见山.
So now I've cited 'Unfamiliarity' as a reason for why greetings such as 'Hi' are used. But there are a few more reasons why one would have to use such greetings, one of which is the broaching difficult topics.
Introduction of characters
A: Sucks at studies.
B: Great at studies.
A: Hi.
B: ?
A: Um, can you help me with something?
B: *cusses behind the computer screen* um..ok (:
.
.
.
.
A: Teach me maths.
So in this case, A wasn't that comfortable with starting off the topic immediately, because of a lack of confidence. Perhaps A thinks that by greeting B, he can soften the immediacy of the impact A's request would be on B. Because when you go like 'can you help me with something?', B would be given the chance to brace himself for impact, as evident from the cussing.
So yea, greetings is a special form of warning.
Consider this, using the same characters in the same scenario.
A: Eh free tomorrow go study together?
B: Uh. Anything.
Which one's better? Not too sure.
And really, is there a need to say 'Hi' on MSN? I mean, when you sign in, you're telling everyone whose status is available that you're online, and ready for chat. That alert you give to people who are ready to chat is itself a 'Hi', like 'Hi I'm online now, (;' kind of 'Hi'. So if you login and initiate conversations, it's quite a loserish thing, that just means that you have said 'Hi' twice to the recipient. That's why I hate initiating conversations, other peoples' desire to seek an audience with me should be stronger than my crave for their attention.
When this tilts to the other persons' favour, meaning the person's desire to seek an audience with me is lower than my high cravings for attention of that person, I FEEL INSECURE. I don't like that crave for attention from anyone. Really >(
BAH. BAHHHHHHHHHH I shall evolve(or devolve) into a tank and kill all the survivors >(ok no link)
What other times do you greet for? I don't really know. It's quite a random post, I kinda came up with it while defecating in the toilet. It's kinda daily-life and thus struck a chord with me and I'd like to share with people what I feel when I shit rather than when I puke. So...yea.
Oh and to the person who blocked me, I think you should still be reading this so unblock me, it's getting boring.
And there are times when you keep checking a site hoping for a miracle, not knowing that the soul has moved on to greener pastures making visitors to that site look like an idiot. I keep looking like an idiot, I don't know why and I hope it doesn't run in the blood because I don't want my kids to have it in the future.
-- 11/07/2009 11:04:00 PM
Food waster.
I never liked puking. It's a waste of food and I hate wasting food because food is meant to be eaten and not wasted. I mean that's what food is for, like how life is meant to be lived and not wasted so I hate wasting life but I end up wasting it anyway so I'd like to save up and make useful what's meant to be made useful such as food.That's why I hate puking. <--sounds like Ikea right?
So it was a terrible night I don't know why but it was with a bloated stomach and I hate having my stomach bloated because that's not what stomachs should feel like so I didn't like it much but I didn't really have a choice because like my life which is being unintentionally wasted I don't have a choice to stop my stomach from being bloated. So I decided 'Fuck I'm gonna puke', and so I did. I'm glad I'm well-versed in the fine arts of puking, so after stoning at the basin for awhile, the short, not-so-melodious sound of chyme-hitting-the-basin resonated throughout the kitchen. The vile smell wasn't artistic and definitely not pleasurable so I washed everything down and went to sleep thinking that the worst was over because I did feel relieved.
But no, to my horror I woke up with some general aching throughout my body and culminated in a form of even-more-bloatedness on Friday morning, so I told Hui Ting that I CMI for school. Then I was reminded that it was Mrs Chng's last day of school, and how could she leave school without my best wishes? So I wrote a letter(in Chinese just to piss her off), went to the doctor to get an MC because I only wanted to get to school solely for her, and forged ahead on the bus.
Poor me on the bus alone sick and tired and wanting to waste even more food even though there's no more food left in me.
It was quite fun though, saying bye to her =\
Bye Mrs Chng.
Seeya around (:
And I kinda thought about why a blow to the balls hurt like hell. I remember Ms Saras(bio cher for the ignorant) talking about how the balls contract in the face of physical threat(but slowly), so it's not much of use. I mean a kick is so much faster than a slow, slight retraction of your gonads, so...yea. But the idea is there. Commendable balls. Moral of the story: lots of nerve cells there I guess. Just anyhow zam one.
And the balls are always hanging around below the abdomen because they can't create sperms due to abdominal heat or something right? They can only be produced at a temperature lower than that of abdominal heat or something, can't really remember, but yea, the idea is there. So there you have it, balls are always sensitive to heat changes and always hangs around ready for action. So the point is: a lot of nerves there.
Nerves + impact = not healthy --> fucking painful.
I haven't gotten to the main point yet.
Guys, when you're down with fever check your balls out. They'd probably be hanging lower than ever, a sure sign of high internal temperature. Notice how the body always keeps the sperm production going even when you're sick? Marvellous, that's why I'm always operationally-ready.
And check another thing out, when you're swimming in cold water, your balls contract. They get closer to your abdomen and keeps warm. Lovely gonads.
OK moral of the story? When your balls are hanging lowly you're probably sick.
Scrap that, when you have balls you're probably sick anyway.
On a completely different note, my cousin just added me on MSN, and the email address had her date of birth: 2001.
Wow. An after-millennium baby. I'M SO OLD.
-- 11/01/2009 01:08:00 PM
Leave him alone.
I saw a real man in school just now. I never really knew him, never really talked to him, never really liked him as a person(probably because I don't know him well enough), but I did enjoy threatening to squeeze his nipples. As I did with almost every other guy that I kinda know.I never knew that he's such a manly man until yesterday. It's Saturday, 2.14AM now, 24th October. I never knew that manly side to him until 13hours ago, when he came out and shrugged his shoulders helplessly, fighting back his disappointment and panic/labels of what was to come, and managed to afford a weak, wistful, smile to all who inquired. He wasn't inhuman enough to remain emotionally isolated, but he managed to shake his head regretfully to all, almost as if he has let everyone else down.
He managed to have a (small) talk with me, and I really didn't know what to say to make him feel better. I was helpless. To a real man like him, what am I to say? What is there to say? What is left to say? What would he rather hear? Would he rather be given his peace and quiet, away from prying eyes and unkind/overly-kind tongues? Would it have been better to let him have that bit of dignity? Or would concern be of use?
He didn't express much verbally. It was all in the non-verbal cues. There was no laughter in his eyes when I tried to crack some jokes to cheer him up--the sinking feeling is too much for him to laugh truly, but he laughed anyway.
I like to think of myself as someone who can see much from eyes, because I'm guud, but I didn't like what I saw. As mentioned, I don't know him well. But I was affected by his mood.
And there was nothing left for anyone to do for him, the die is cast and nothing anybody said would be of help. Concern is an euphemism for destruction of pride. Are we to bestow it upon him then? And if we did, then what?
I think he'd rather we leave him alone.
-- 10/20/2009 12:35:00 AM